Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I cut my penus on the lid.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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