You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He has the fingertips of a God
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