VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
