Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
