I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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