But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I just got carded by a ten year old.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
