just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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