This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i just google imaged poop.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
you never un-have a 4some
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
