Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
