My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
