omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize