lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
