He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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