C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
