just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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