Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
