I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize