I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
