when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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