We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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