Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
