I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
