I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
