i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
