i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
