Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
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