so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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