i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
This house was built for laser tag.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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