She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
