im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
