More tranny stories later!
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
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