yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
