For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
it's like heaven, but drunker
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
