i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Randomize
