Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
