i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
