I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
