I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize