you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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