Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
