God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
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