ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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