i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
NoShamevember. You game?
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
