READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
