Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
This house was built for laser tag.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
