Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
