I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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