Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize