I should be sponsored by Trojan
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize