What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
