ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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